Don’t call it adulting, ffs

I’m in the process of getting stuff together for our taxes. Like pretty much everyone else, this isn’t a fun time for me. This year I’m actually on top of things — as much as I ever am. I’m not a fan of things with numbers. Except algebra.

This brings me to something that irritates the sh*t outta me. Using the word “adulting” to describe doing normal grown-up stuff.

Please, just stop.  Not only is it cutesy, but it makes it sound as if it’s a special thing you’re engaged in.  When you are a grown-up, you do adult things. I mean, c’mon, this is simple sh*t.  Turning everyday responsibilities into a special achievements is pretty sad.

Paying the bills is not an achievement that warrants a special shout out on whatever social media platform you’re using. One, no one cares about it. And two, it’s not as adorable as you think it is.

Doing your laundry, cleaning the house, yada yada. These are not notable events. (They’re also things that no one notices when they’re done. But that’s another post.) This is everyday sh*t that most people do without wanting a pat on the head. If you really want to engage in adulting, just do your fucking chores.

And also, adult is not a verb. As in, “I don’t want to adult anymore today.” (Of course, changing nouns into verbs is the devil’s work…that’s also another post.) Oh, go ahead and use it as one, thereby speeding the inevitable decline of western civilization.  Knock yourself out. 

Get off my lawn.

Let’s call “Not Adulting” by what it really is — f*cking off. And let’s just call adulting, being a responsible grown-up and leave it at that. See, easy peasy and no one gets hurt.